The Sorcerer's Apprentice

January 5

NOTICE OF LEGAL ACTION

Re: Twelve drummers drumming (and other acts of warfare)

My client, Ms. Emily Harrison, is seeking immediate criminal charges and financial compensation against Mr. Fredrick Davidson for orchestrating what has become the most depraved Christmas celebration since Caligula’s winter festival.

Current damages include:

– Psychological trauma
– Minor to major property destruction (36 charges)
– Destruction of a designated heritage building
– Public indecency charges (51)
– Twentysix noise violations
– One very confused tax assessor
– Multiple outraged church groups
– A partridge with a drinking problem

Cease and desist all deliveries immediately before we add human trafficking to the charges.

With extreme prejudice,
Herbert Blackwood

Partner, Blackwood & Associates
Solicitors at Law

Midjourney prompt:

An opulent Victorian estate with smoke and flames billowing from the windows, firetrucks and ambulances and police cars with lights flashing in front, people frantically running around, 12 mm lens, 4k, vibrant colours –ar 4:3 –style raw –c 10 –v 6.1